Post Election Haiku

And so it's over.

The Oval Office withers

Melania vents.

Lol. Haven't had one of these for a while.

 

Good day! I would like to alert you about a very dreadful predicament for you. Nonetheless, you can gain from it, if you will act wisely. Have you heard about Pegasus? This is a malware application that installs on machines and mobile devices and allows hackers to observe the activity of gadget operators. It provides access to your webcam, instant messaging apps, electronic mail, phone transcripts, etc. It works well on iOS, Windows, Android. I believe, you by now understood where I'm getting at. It's been a few weeks since I installed it on every your devices because of you were not quite selective about what hyperlinks to press on the internet. During this time, I've discovered about each aspects of your intimate life, however one is of particular significance to me. I've captured innumerable footage of you self-pleasuring to highly questionable porn clips. Given that the "controversial" type is almost always the same, I can infer that you have twisted perversion. I also stored each your important files - records, images, clips, etc. - to a external system. I question you'd want your friends, relatives, and colleagues to be aware about it. However, I can accomplish it in a handful of clicks. All entry in your phone list will abruptly obtain these clips - on WhatsApp, on Telegram, on Skype, on message - everywhere. It is about to be a flood that will sweep away everything in its path, and in the first instance, your past existence. Don't think of yourself as an blameless sufferer. No one knows where your corruption might take in the times to come, so view this a kind of earned consequence to halt you. Better postponed than not at all. I am some kind of Deity who sees everything. Nonetheless, do not freak out. As we know, Deity is merciful and forgiving, and so do I. Nonetheless my compassion is not without cost. Deposit $1300 USD to this digital currency account - BTC:                 Wallet-Name Here Let's acknowledge it, that is a pretty small amount in today's environment. As soon as I get affirmation of the transaction, I will completely remove each clips compromising you, uninstall Pegasus from all of your items, and vanish from your life. You can be certain - my benefit is only cash. If it were any different, I wouldn't be writing to you, however devastate your existence without a word in a moment. I will be alerted when you access my e-mail, and from that moment, you have exactly 12 hours to send the funds. If virtual currencies are an unexplored domain for you, do not worry; it's very simple. Just search "crypto exchange" and then it will be no more difficult than acquiring a couple of trivial stuff on Amazon. I firmly caution you against the subsequent: - Do not answer to this message. I forwarded it from a temp address so I'm invisible. - Don't reach out to the authorities. I have reach to every your equipment, and when I find out you went to the cops, videos will be released. - Don't try to restore or destroy your machinery. As I mentioned above: I am observing every your activity, so you either agree to my conditions or the videos are exposed. In addition, don't forget that digital currencies are discreet, so it is difficult to identify me using the given address. Good luck, my deviant friend. I trust you will take the appropriate decision and this is the last time we hear from each other. And several friendly suggestions: as of now, don't be so negligent about your internet protection.

Haiku

An election looms

Pardons are going to flow.

Bad Things. Lights go out.

Haiku for a Dog Mauling

Big Dog, Small Manhood. 

Enough said on the matter. 

Poo is brown and smells.

Haiku

Now the days count down;

An election is in sight.
Our choices are shit.

Nigel's Limerick

Nigel ate dinner in Belgium

With a woman who is more than his chum.

He’s the MP for Clacton

But he clearly doesn’t give a damn.

And he only thinks of his voters, seldom.

haiku the noo!

So the trial starts

And the hair bobs in the wind 

Control your client!

Habba Limerick

There once was was a lawyer called Habba

Who I am sure would allow her client to grab her

To get more of the limelight

She’s go on Hannity every night

And just jabber and jabber and jabber.

My Top Ten Movies for 2023

Infinity Pool

Evil Dead Rise

Sisu

How to Blow Up a Pipeline

Blackberry

Past Lives

Talk to Me

Oppenheimer

Godzilla Minus One

Poor Things

Limerick on Wayne LaPierre resigning

There once was a man called LaPierre

Who just spent his members money like there

Wasn’t any supervision

For any decision

For any check that he pulled from his derriere.

Movies to avoid in 2024

Kung Fu Panda 4

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

Rebel Moon: Part Two – The Scargiver

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

The Garfield Movie

Inside Out 2

Bad Boys 4

A Quiet Place: Day One

Despicable Me 4

Deadpool 3

Alien: Romulus

Kraven the Hunter

Beetlejuice 2

Transformers One

Saw XI

Joker: Folie a Deux

Smile 2

Terrifier 3

Venom 3

Gladiator 2

Wicked: Part One

Karate Kid

Sonic the Hedgehog 3

What I saw in 2023

Women Talking

Roman Holiday ( 70^th anniversary showing )

Infinity Pool

Everything Everywhere All at Once ( 2^nd viewing )

Living

Pathaan

Consecration

Knock at the Cabin

Marlowe

Juniper

Luther: The Fallen Sun

Project Wolf Hunting ( Streaming )

All Quiet On The Western Front

John Wick: Chapter 4

Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

Nefarious

Mafia Mama

The Pope’s Exorcist

Renfield

Evil Dead Rise

Beau Is Dead

How to Blow Up a Pipeline

Sisu

Polite Society

BlackBerry

Master Gardener

The Blackening

Asteroid City

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Dismay

Past Lives

The Lesson

Mission Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One

Sound of Freedom

The Miracle Club

Cobweb

Talk To Me

Oppenheimer

Theater Camp

Retribution

The Retirement Plan

Jawan

It Lives Inside

The Kill Room

The Exorcist 50^th Anniversary Edition

The Royal Hotel

Dumb Money

She Came To Me

Killers of the Flower Moon

Anatomy of a Fall

Suitable Flesh

What Happens Later

The Marsh King’s Daughter

Thanksgiving

Next Goal Wins

Saltburn

Napoleon x 2

Silent Night

Dream Scenario

Godzilla Minus One

Animal

Eileen

The Boy and The Heron

Wonka

Poor Things

Oooh! I'm Scared Sh*tless - Phish my ass.

Case Number: JH33HAM12210S 

Outstanding Amount:  $3699.66 

Lender: Cash Advance USA 

Time Left: 5 hours. 

Contact: att.alexa@outlook.com 

 

We write to you with grave concern regarding your persistent disregard for previous notices concerning the resolution of your outstanding debt. This communication represents your last and final opportunity to settle this matter out of court, provided that you take immediate action within the next five hours of receiving this notice. Failure to comply will result in dire consequences. 

 

It has come to our attention that the United Legal Investigation Bureau has filed four serious allegations against you, which carry significant legal implications: 

 

1. Violation of Federal Banking Regulation 

2. Collateral Check Fraud 

3. Theft by Deception 

4. Electronic Fund Transfer 

 

Please be duly informed that Cash Advance USA, the parent company, bears responsibility for all outstanding debts. Irrespective of the subsidiary through which the loan was obtained, Some of the subsidiaries are (Speedy Cash, Cash Net USA, Ace Cash Express, Cash Advance, Check 'n Go, Advance America, Check City, Check Into Cash, Title Max, 100 Days, Net Loan USA, Cash Advance, 100 Day Loan, Net loan the USA, Fax free Cash, Payday one, Sonic Cash Money tree, Egg loans, Check cash Loan, Quickly Payday, Personal Cash Advance, Rapid Cash, Sonic Payday, Speedy Cash, My Cash Now, National Payday, Cash Central Loans, Cash Net 500, Cash Net USA, Allied Cash, Super Pawn, Check into Cash, Check Smart, Cash America Net, Cash America, Cash America Pawn, Cash land, Super Pawn, Cash America Payday Advance). The primary lender possesses the right to file a complaint and pursue legal recourse through the appropriate channels, including the courthouse. 

 

To forestall further legal action, we present you with the following payment options, which demand your immediate attention: 

 

1. One-time settlement of $1900, leading to a complete resolution of the debt in next 5 hours. 

2. Weekly/biweekly payments of $300 until the debt is fully repaid starting from today in next 5 hours. 

 

We implore you to grasp the gravity of the situation and take immediate action to rectify it. Failure to do so within the stipulated time frame will result in the following severe consequences: 

 

- The case will be officially filed at the local courthouse. 

- Your employer, bank, and references will be promptly notified of this grave matter. 

- A lawsuit will be filed against you, seeking a total sum of $17766.87, exclusive of attorney charges and any outstanding balance associated with your name. 

 

The repercussions of these actions may include but are not limited to wage garnishment, termination of employment, Social Security Number (SSN) blockage, and other forms of severe legal measures that we deem necessary to recover the debt owed. 

 

Time is of the utmost essence, leaving you with a mere four hours to comply with this final opportunity for an out-of-court settlement. We expect an immediate response to this matter by contacting us at att.james@outlook.com, wherein we can discuss appropriate payment arrangements. 

 

We caution against underestimating the urgency and potential ramifications of this situation. Failing to act promptly will result in the swift initiation of severe legal actions against you. 

 

We strongly advise that you seek legal counsel to fully comprehend the implications and potential ramifications of your choices. If you require further clarification or have any inquiries, please do not hesitate to contact our office.  

 

att.alexa@outlook.com 

 

Let this serve as a final warning that non-compliance will result in severe consequences, including potential criminal charges, a costly lawsuit, and the issuance of an arrest warrant. We strongly advise you to reconsider your course of action and take immediate steps to settle the outstanding debt before it escalates further. 

 

 

- 

 

James Anderson Law Firm 

3282 Estate Drive #240 

Cincinnati, OH 45202 

Website: www.attjamesanderson.com 

Hide a koo

Today a shooting
Tomorrow will be pizza
Then Elon will speak.

Haiku Challenge

First an indictment.

Oaths, lawyer talk, a sentence.

Then they take your comb.

Haiku a boo boo

Nadine and Boris

Just nest liners to the end.

Don’t be bad pennies.

Movies to miss in 2023. Apologies for the late post.

Movies to avoid in 2023. Sequels galore.

80 for Brady

Magic Mike’s Last Dance

Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania

Creed III

Children of the Corn

Scream VI

Shazam! Fury of the Gods

The Super Mario Bros Movie

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3

Book Club: The Next Chapter

Fast X

The Little Mermaid

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

Insidious: The Red Door

Mission Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One

Barbie

Disney’s Haunted Mansion

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem

The Meg 2: The Trench

The Equalizer 3

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2

The Nun 2

The Expendables 4

PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie

Exorcist: Believer

Saw 10

The Marvels

The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

Wonka

Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom

Ghostbusters: Afterlife 2

Phishing 17th April 2023

It is you who is guilty of getting into current situation because of ur levity in relation to the security of your device. Of course, it is not for me to judge men who are dependent on their guilty pleasures. You have certainly shocked me by ur masturbation which I observed through ur webcam. The whole contact list from ur mail will get the dirt with your vile hobbies, that is what I can guarantee, what to do is entirely up to u. 

Here 1MB6VM4XQcaBcJmiCMvZwCwZzgCXXXXXXX Bitcoin, and I think that 1299 usd is fair for u, and forty six hours are more than enough for that take advantage of the opportunity and fix the problem with less bloodshed.

Limerick 2023

There once was a man called DeSantis,

Who made people shout “WTF is this?”

He was beaten by Disney,

Like a bad child with no tea.

And now all he has are tantrums and antics.

Let's start off 2023 with an extortion demand.

Oh heavens, a classic you-watch-porn blackmail pitch. And btw my criminal friend, your

English is total shit.

Greetings!

I have to share bad news with you. Approximately a few months ago, I gained access to your

devices, which you use for internet browsing.

After that, I have started tracking your internet activities.

Here is the sequence of events:

Some time ago, I purchased access to email accounts from hackers (nowadays, it is quite

simple to buy it online). I have easily managed to log in to your email account

oldbolxxxbrokefl@gmail.c0m.

One week later, I have already installed the Cobalt Strike "Beacon" on the Operating Systems

of all the devices you use to access your email. It was not hard at all (since you were

following the links from your inbox emails). All ingenious is simple. :).

Ooooh scary name “Cobalt Strike Beacon”!! And btw, that sentence makes no sense.

This software provides me with access to all your devices controllers (e.g., your microphone,

video camera, and keyboard). I have downloaded all your information, data, photos, videos,

documents, files, web browsing history to my servers. I have access to all your messengers,

social networks, emails, chat history, and contacts list. Er...no you don’t.

My virus continuously refreshes the signatures (it is driver-based) and hence remains invisible

for antivirus software. Likewise, I guess by now you understand why I have stayed

undetected until this letter. Again, gibberish.

While gathering information about you, I have discovered that you are a  big fan of adult

websites. You love visiting porn websites and watching exciting videos while enduring an

enormous amount of pleasure. Well, I have managed to record a number of your dirty

scenes and montaged a few videos, which show how you masturbate and reach orgasms.

“enduring”? That is s strange word you choose.

If you have doubts, I can make a few clicks of my mouse, and all your videos will be shared

with your friends, colleagues, and relatives. Considering the specificity of the videos you like

to watch (you perfectly know what I mean), it will cause a real catastrophe for you.

Oh I have my doubts. Click away. I dare you.

I also have no issue at all with making them available for public access (leaked and exposed

all data). General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR): Under the rules of the law, you face a

heavy fine or arrest. No I don’t. No such regulation. You are the one committing the crimes here.

I guess you don't want that to happen. Frankly, I don’t give a fuck mate.

Let's settle it this way:

You transfer 1.5 Bitcoin ( $34,044 at today’s exchange rate ) to me and once the transfer is

received, I will delete all this dirty stuff right away. After that, we will forget about each other. I

also promise to deactivate and delete all the harmful software from your devices. Trust me. I

keep my word. No you don’t. You are a criminal.

That is a fair deal, and the price is relatively low, considering that I have been checking out

your profile and traffic for some time by now. If you don't know how to purchase and transfer

Bitcoin – you can use any modern search engine.

You need to send that amount here Bitcoin wallet:

bc1qqj2td566nfuck4z0youdxeql2in5theqassdk

(The price is not negotiable)

You have 5 days in order to make the payment from the moment you opened this email.

Do not try to find and destroy my virus! (All your data is already uploaded to a remote server).

Do not try to contact me. Various security services will not help you;formatting a disk or

destroying a device will not help either, since your data is already on a remote server.

This is an APT Hacking Group. Don't be mad at me, everyone has their own work.

I will monitor your every move until I get paid. Good luck with that.

If you keep your end of the agreement, you won't hear from me ever again.

Everything will be done fairly!

Extortion by its very definition cannot be done fairly. You sad cunt.